So during this "gap year" of mine, my main purpose in life has been to torment my freshly minted teenage sister (her 13th birthday was on the 16th) with my existence and general weirdness. However, I do like to subject her to some good things as well. Mainly, the music of the late '90s and early '00s that I hold near and dear to my heart. Though I obviously enjoy a lot of pop music today, there is just something about the music of my late elementary through middle school (and maybe early high school) years that spoke to me and many of my friends at that age. Naturally, we couldn't actually relate to it when I really thought about it (unless we were really thrown about our chick on the side telling us she had one on the way. At 14. Try explaining that one to mom and dad), and a lot of it doesn't really age well, but for what it was and for who (whom? help!) I was at the time, it was mostly perfect. So I wanted to see how it all stood up to today's tween generation's standards, represented somewhat begrudgingly by my sister, Amy (who is actually much cooler and smarter than I ever was at that age). I basically forced her to listen to and watch a bunch of videos (while I watched them like my 8-13 year old self would have) and watched the generational gap reveal itself. So here we go! Below is a muddled transcript of our evening plus some more commentary on each song and video.
Me and Amy being casual.
Amy vs. My Childhood
Ghetto Supastar (its really painful for me to spell it like that)
Abena: Okay, so the first video we are going to watch is Ghetto Superstar by Pras, Mya and ODB. Do you know who ODB was? Amy: No... Abena: Do you know what ODB stands for? Amy: No... Abena: Good. Amy: (not really listening)... Abena: You don't like this??? Amy: Why is this song in a movie about Presidents? Abena: Why is Rick Ross's music in Django Unchained???
Revisiting this song with my 22 year old mind: I distinctly remember this as THE jam in the second grade.
how I dance when it comes on.
The best part of watching this now is seeing David Rosen of ABC's 'Scandal' fame in the background. Oh and Mya's perfection. According to Amy's reaction, this song might not translate very well today's musical standards. I maintain that today's musical standards aren't all that high, so I reject her reaction. But to be fair, 90s rappers are of a different breed than today's rappers that tweens are exposed to. It's just a different sound that people Amy's age are growing up today with the Drakes, the J Coles, and the Big Seans. But for the most part, the song is all about Mya and the chorus. I feel like that stands the test of time, and we have Kenny Rogers' original melody for that. Islands in the Jam was a jam (don't lie, you loved it. Kenny and Dolly killed it).
M2M - Mirror mirror
Abena: This song is so epic!! Amy: (shrugs) Abena: Amy, when I was like, 8 or 9, this song was EVERYTHING. Amy: (starts laughing) Abena: WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING?? Amy: ...is that really her voice? Abena: YES. It's like Britney. kind of. UGH. So good. (singing along as Amy just stares at me). Ten year old me had so many emotions Amy: Why is she just lying in the grass by herself? Abena: You don't do that?
Revisiting this song with my 22 year old mind: Okay, so Amy's dislike of this song is somewhat understandable. Today's top female singers all have really powerful voices (except for Taylor Swift). I stand by my Britney Spears comparison. And honestly, there's something about somewhat thin vocals that convey emotions strangely well...at least for me. Like, I can't imagine Christina Aguilera singing a song like "Everytime" and making it sound as sad. Maybe its because you focus more on the words and their meanings when the singer isn't all that. But then again, I'm pretty sure I listened to 'Someone Like You' (Adele) at least 80 times in a row when I first heard and and felt the pain of watching my imaginary boyfriend get married EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
never mind i'll find....
Whatever, back to M2M, the Norwegian beauties behind this song (I maintain that Scandanavians are the best producers of pop music). As far as I knew, they only had two songs: this one and "Don't Say You Love Me" from the Pokemon Movie. Listening to "Mirror, Mirror" now though, I'm still all about it (my biases are strong, i'm not sorry about it). 2:24 where the instruments drop out briefly and then come back in is a perfect pop moment. I guess their voices are somewhat annoying though.
Play - Whole Again
Abena: Okay, all you need to know is that the ginger is the best one. Amy: That one girls dress looks like Lady Gaga's meat dress Abena: Do you like this song though? Amy: Yeah Abena: Why do you like it Amy: I dont know Abena: See, Faye is the only one that sings. There was an uneven distribution of solos.
(we get to the spoken middle 8 of the song) Amy: Why is she doing that? Abena: This is an important part of the song. and then Faye kills it. get 'em Faye. Get 'em!! Amy: This is the first song that I've liked so far
Revisiting this song with my 22 year old mind: Clearly we see now that Amy has fabulous pop music taste. This song was pop at at sugary-sweetest. This song was actually originally by Atomic Kitten, but redone by these four ladies (they changed the line "you still turn me on" to "you can do no wrong"). Also of note is that Play is basically Sweden's version of the Sugababes (reference only some will get) and Destiny's Child. Members just coming and going like nothing. But this version of Play is the definite version (most because I've never bothered with the other ones). Faye (the ginger) really was the best one, and I love that they didn't try to hide it. She basically had the Nicole role in the Pussy Cat Dolls. My favorite thing about this video is how dated the "hot guys" look already...until I realize this came out ten years ago. This is my exact reaction to their appearances/faces:
One guy is wearing a pooka shell necklace, one has a gross goatee and spiked hair, and another looks like Kris Humphries (and they didn't even reserve the only good looking guy for Faye like they should have because she is the best). And that poor white girl with the braids (aka meat dress girl).
I dont know who she thinks she is (oh wait, yes I do), but that's just really unfortunate. Fast forward a couple of years and she's the only one whose solo music I actively still listen to (I would have listen to queen Faye's stuff, but I dont know where it is/I think she's rejoined the like 7th line-up of Play or something like that). Seriously, Anais (dark haired one) was always my fave when I was younger, but Faye is flawless.
3LW - No More
Abena: Oh wait. oh my gosh 3LW! do you know them?? Amy: 3LW? Abena: Yes! 3 little women? Amy: Oh, i thought it meant like, length and width. Abena: ...No, sadly that's not what it is. Anyway, you'll recognize maybe two out of three of them Amy: (starts laughing) Cheetah girls! They had their own group without Raven or Sabrina? Abena: Yeah! 3LW. And then they didn't let that one girl in the cheetah girls
(song starts. 10 seconds in) Amy: ...What is she saying? Abena: You can't understand her? Amy: No, it sounds like gibberish. What is she saying? Can you put closed captions on?
(Adrienne Bailon starts singing) Abena: You understand her right? Amy: Yeah. not the other one. Aqua, right? Abena: Thats not her real name. Kiely Williams is her name. I dont know what the third one's name is Amy: She's a good singer too. So they didn't let her do anything? Abena: Nope, do you like the skirt over her jeans? Amy: Was that a trend? Abena: Nope, thats probably why she got kicked out of the group Amy: Abena, be nice.
Revisiting this song with my 22 year old mind: Yeah everything about this song screams year 2000. THE FASHION OH DEAR LORD.
you think it's cute...but it's not.
There's literally not much to say about this, except that Adrienne Bailon is now famous for being Rob Kardashian's ex girlfriend, and Kiely Williams...went on to make really really really REALLY poor choices. The whereabouts of whatsherface are still unknown (I can't be bothered to google her. Also, what is her name still).
BBMak - Back Here
Abena: You know BBMak right? Amy: No Abena: (tears) Amy, dont do this to me. They were on Even Stevens one time. Amy: Wow they're really good Abena: AMY DO YOU THINK I LISTEN TO PEOPLE WHO DONT SING WELL??
Revisiting this song with my 22 year old mind: MARRY ME CHRISTIAN I STILL LOVE YOU.
This has been more music nostalgia, brought to you by the sisters Brown.
I can't just use this blog to review one direction CDs...jk, I totally could. But I won't. But since I am dangerously bored with my life, I've decided to start this up again and do what I love (other than eating, watching NCIS and SVU, and applying to medical school): over-analyzing pop music!!
Do you ever get super defensive over a song when a new song comes out with the same title? Like, without even hearing the actual new song, you decide in your mind that the 'original' song is a masterpiece that will forever be second to none? Maybe I'm alone in this, but irrational mind did this when Justin Bieber's 'As long As You Love Me.' Especially since I am disturbingly territorial about the Backstreet Boys, I don't think I went out of my way to listen to Bieber's song for the longest time, just on principle. But realistically, they were two different songs. And despite sharing 6 words, they don't even sound remotely alike. But there always has to be a winner and a loser in these things ya know. So in my free-time (lunch break), I have decided to figure all that out for all of those people out there that wanted the answers (so, no one). Here's a first batch!
Song Title Wars part 1
Song: As Long As You Love Me
The Incumbent: Backstreet Boys
Key Points: Considering this is one of my top 5 favorite BSB songs, it's just gonna be pretty hard to beat from the get go. It is written by the greatest pop lyrical genius of all time, Max Martin. Yeah upon further inspection as a non-8 year old, the lyrics are a bit suspect. Manti Te'o probably listened to this song every night after getting off the phone with Lennay Kukua. But there's just something quite magical about them at the same time. The song is heavy on 2/3 of the Nick-Brian-AJ vocal trio of greatness, with AJ being the odd-man out this time. Big shout out to Kev and Howie, though. This song wouldn't be nearly as good without all the harmonies, and they lay it on thick like butter on Paula Deen's buiscuits. The bridge into the last chorus and the descant of sorts on top of it is just lovely. Also, Nick's "Yeah-ah-ah" wins. every. time.
Video Bonus: Oh man, so many things. Nick's visual peak/bowl cut, and the fact that this video was filmed during that weirdly short window where his voice matched his face perfectly (He still sounds like he is 17 when he sings even though he's like thirty, but I dont even care). Kevin's eyebrows, THE FANTASTIC CHAIR DANCING, jeans and black (always a good look), and of course, the stunning ethnic diversity of the women in the video. As usual, I pretended I was the black girl.
The Challenger: Justin Bieber
Key Points: So despite my initial resistance when it first came out, I do really like this song. Justin sounds good, and it fit perfectly into the mainstream pop that was big when it came out out, especially with the dub-steppy beat. I've enjoyed Bieber's voice even when he sounded like a little girl all of two years ago, so hearing this was pretty cool. And the falsetto bit where he sings "lo-lo...-love me" is actually a great pop moment, mostly because you're not expecting it. The lyrics aren't on the 'Liquid Dreams' (Shout out to O-town letting me drop my name in that song every once in a while. "I dream about a girl who's a mix of Destiny's Child, just a little pinch of ABENA's wild style, and Janet Jackson's smile...") end of the wackness scale, but they aren't all that great either. But like, Big Sean, what the hell? Every time I hear the rap, this is how I feel:
just...WHY? I'm pretty sure Aaron Carter would have done a better job with those 45 seconds. smh.
Video Bonus: wait, I've never watched this before. What the hell is going on? I'll give a bonus for Justin Bieber's music career, because clearly acting shouldn't be his thing. Also, I'm uncomfortable with justin bieber's fetus looking self getting cozy with a girl. Okay, I do like the dancing. So that's good.
Verdict: Backstreet wins. Though the BSB song sounds ever so slightly dated compared to Justin's attempt to stay with the current pop standards, never underestimate the value of 3-part harmony and chair dancing.
Song: Sober
The Incumbent: Pink
Key Points: Can we just talk for a minute about how great Pink's voice is? Even though she can get kind of annoying when she's in her niche of "tough girl' power pop (a la So What, Raise Your Glass etc.), when she's a bit more stripped down the rocky quality of her voice really shines through and you realize how emotive her voice can be. This song is a classic case of that. And the lyrics are pretty interesting. It might be about love, relationships,or alcohol, or an abstract entity that I haven't even thought of, but it can be taken so many ways, which is kind of cool. Video Bonus: Okay, never seen this one before either. Props for Pink looking pretty...while helping herself throw up? wait, what??? Op, and now we've entered some clean white room and she's got a dramatic haircut. I don't know. Props for looking like Sia before Sia was a thing I guess...Aaaaaand she's making ot with herself. Bonus for just weirding everyone out, but owning it. You do you, Pink. You do you.
The Challenger: Jade Alston
Key Points: This song is so simplistic in its structure, but it still manages to be great. Just when you think Lil Mama's crazy eyes are going to pop out and start singing about Lip Gloss, Jade Alston's vocals come in and its like a refreshing wave. I love this because she clearly knows her voice and just doesn't sound like she's trying to do too much. It makes for a really enjoyable listening experience. And the vocal overlay is great. The background is drum-heavy, but still kind of sparce, and builds to chorus. And I love the lyrics and how relatable they feel. Basically I'm in love with Jade Alston and want to be her. Video Bonus: all the bonus points because this video is the premise of all my elementary school birthday parties, making videos and dances with my friends to Destiny's Child songs. It was clearly made on a budget of the 5 dollars of gas money it took her friends to show up at her house, but its great.
Verdict: By the slimmest of margins, Jade wins. I love Pink and she really does kill it vocally on Sober, but the freshness of Jade's song just hits the spot.
Song: Stutter The Incumbent: Joe
Key Points: OH MY WORD DOES ANYONE REMEMBER THIS JAM? This song was all sorts of perfect in 2000. The intro is amazing. He makes no effort to rhyme except for like twice (you with you, naturally), he's just like, talking haha. But it doesn't even matter. Its was like the younger version of 'Busted' by the Isley Brothers (epic song in the continuum of "I caught you cheating" tracks), the male version of 'Say My Name' and the accidental prelude to 'Cry Me A River' (from the content and the camcorder work in the video) all rolled into one. And he actually stutters when he says stutter. Also, the Mystikal Remix is the only acceptable version of this song. Mostly because he screams "WATCH YOURSELF" (a la 'shake it fast'. haha i always like the censored title better) and name checks Wafflehouse. And he says, "YOU BETTA RESPECT MA FLOW' (Mystikal only speaks in all caps). Mad Respec, Mystikal. There's a video going around where the kid asks a generation "What will be your Space Jam?" But what I really want to know is who will be their Mystikal? Video Bonus: I'm still super confused as to what is even going on in the video, but I guess that's a good thing. Also, Fubu is alive and well.
The Challenger: Maroon 5
Key Points: Haha well this song couldn't be more different. If I get I understand the lyrics correctly, The stuttering here is due to being so in love with someone that it just kind of leaves you speechless? Alrighty then. This song is pretty great either way. You honestly can't go wrong with heavy piano (its in there under all the guitars). And as hot and cold as I am with Adam Levine's aesthetic qualities (he flips between slimy looking and genuinely attractive so easily to me), I'm almost always down with his voice. The melody chorus chorus just makes you wanna two step and smile. Oh and most importantly, he does stutter when he says "stutter," which is again crucial. Video Bonus: no official video, which is quite annoying. But thank the Lord for live videos. You can hear the piano, which to me is the most important. And there's often a third harmony on the "be with you/you and me always" line Verdict: Joe wins. As much as I love it, Maroon 5 never really stood a chance.
There's loads more multiple-offender song titles, so I'm going to have fun with this over the next (however long my attention span will allow it)! Suggestions are always welcome!
That's right. Its November, so I'm due to have a freakout about and preview the 25-30 second One Direction Album clips, making gross over- and underestimations about the future of the band and pop music in general. AAAAAH I'm giddy just thinking about it.
ZUT. muffins
As their self-proclaimed one-woman North American promotion team (I kid, I kid), I take pride in my 1D pimping. Its only because I try this all the time with all the British/African/Australian/Euro-in-general music that I listen to, and One Direction was one of the first times that other people were actually also listening to something that I was listening to without me having to force them into it. Watching every pregame and party turn into a One Direction love-in by the end of the night over the course of last year was like watching a water birth, but in the way where at first you're like "wtf" (because you can't believe its happening) but then decide you're gonna enjoy the moment and start cheering for the baby like you're at game 7 of the NBA finals.
this was supposed to be a picture of a water birth but I almost threw up searching for pictures, so instead we're gonna look at Captain America himself, Carlos Bocanegra (or Charles Blackmouth as he's known in Mexico)
The greatness of Up All Night as a comprehensive pop album still hasn't worn off on me (Its still one of the only two CDs I have in my car, the other being Babel by Mumford and Sons). But as the music industry is now about staying relevant, less than a year later (or maybe exactly a year, I dont know) they are already preparing to drop the second album, Take Me Home. They're clearly following the Rihanna method of 'record an album for every breath you take,' which is fine I guess. But it doesn't really allow for the growth and evolution in their sound that people seem to expect from musicians these days (of course, this might just be me and all the people on all the pop blogs and forums that I read religiously. And before you ask, I do currently have two jobs. What is my life). Which is honestly fine and dandy, because they seem pretty aware of this fact. Live While We're Young was the perfect example of that. I obviously love it, but it was by no means a "game-changer." If anything, they were just slightly more explicit about the sexual nature of their lyrics, but that's about it. It appeals to the masses, is catchy as hell (though perhaps not as catchy as WMYB), and suffered from an untimely leak (no thanks to you, Australian tv station) that saw it going up against Rihanna's Diamonds and Gagnam Style in the charts. But otherwise, they seemed to me to be following the course towards another successful campaign.
Then this little ditty dropped.
Little Things is an ginger prince Ed Sheeran penned stripped back ballad (obviously so). And its fine. It is. I probably cried when I heard it first (in fact, I'm almost positive I did), but thats because I always cry about everything. But its definitely a grower. Zayn and Liam sound like heaven in the first verse (comme d'hab), and the first chorus is perfect because it is Zayn heavy and I would listen to him sing my college/med school rejection letters. Then it gets a bit weird. Louis comes in with the second verse. Louis is not the strongest singer (I'm not that blinded by their light that I would lie about that) but I also started to realize that he also has one of the more distinct tones. Its like, almost a little too bright or some other term that I dont know how to misuse, and a little nasal. And this fact coupled with his small vocal range makes him stick out like a sore thumb on his solo lines when he actually has them. And as a side note, he doesn't blend well in general (they usually mask this in other songs by having him on melody with Harry and Zayn). But its honestly a passable effort, and Niall sounds fine on his bit. Harry sounds like a chain smoker on his verse, but is good on the chorus. And the last chorus is really pretty and great. Overall, its actually not bad and gets better with every listen. But good lord, the lyrics. They're the reason why I haven't been able to get into this as much as I wanted to. And I love Ed Sheeran. Like way a lot. But he wrote this when he was 15 (true fact) and found the scribbles in his trashcan and said 'I'll give this poop to my mates in One Direction, innit bruv?' (probably an exaggeration). They're just...awful. Like, I'm all about the pandering to young insecure girls, but this just doesn't feel the same. It kind of takes the charm of What Makes You Beautiful, but turns it on its head a bit. Whereas before I was flipping my hurr and smiling at the ground and shit like that, this time my flaws have been enumerated and named...and its almost like they'll love you in spite of that instead of because of it. Does that makes sense? Its like trading in Zooey Deschanel or Bridget Jones, a quirky hot girl who pretends not to realize she's hot, a la What Makes You Beautiful, for Helga Pataki, or basically a girl with a unibrow and low self esteem (clearly masked by her tough exterior). This song would be like every time Arnold says something sweet to her and she suddenly gets lovey-dovey and validated and I hate that.
STAY STRONG HELGA GIRL YOU DONT NEED A MAN TO MAKE YOU FEEL BEAUTIFUL.
Its so silly, because the message of both songs are very similar, but its the delivery that kills it a bit. Also, the word "thighs" just needs to stay the hell away from music forever. Ed clearly just kept all the good songs for himself haha.
But the video is quite redeeming isn't it? Its an understated black and white affair which allows you to focus on how attractive everyone has become instead of the lyrics. Zayn and Harry remains flawless. Louis has slowly but steadily been shuffling the hotness line-up, and his denim jacket is a good look. Niall still stares into the camera for an awkwardly long amount of time, but like give it six months, and he'll be smouldering with the best of them (probs when his braces come off). and Liam...well, Liam at least looks like he's recovering from his post-breakup Britney-esque breakdown buzzcut (you can't tell me thats not what it was. hide the umbrellas y'all).
its okay 5-head. No one is judging you for your emotional reaction to the break up.
So basically the visual helped ease my disappointment in the second single, which is exactly what happened with Gotta Be You. In fact, Gotta Be You and Little Things basically served the same purpose. The ballad-y/mid-tempo second single that is a solid album track but REALLY REALLY should never have been a single. But again, growers.
So anyway. The actual point of this whole thing. I went into this thing with mixed expectations after hearing the first two singles. But here's my ramble-y album preview review!
2. Kiss You - ooooh I like this one!!! Its instantly infectious and makes you wanna run or something equally as silly. It reminds me of a song that you would hear in the Disney Channel Original Movie 'Get a Clue,' or something of that ilk. They do fast well. Zayn and Harry sound marvelous in this clip. Oh and the album title comes from this one! the verses are frantic and then it slows down into an awesome chorus. Here for this!
3. C'mon C'mon - eh. Its okay. I hear potential. It has a "My Life would Suck without you" kind of beat. Or I guess its a similar driving beat thats in "Save you Tonight" from the first album. So I'll probably like it eventually. On second listen its very much in the vein of Save you Tonight. Generic sounding but ultimately fun
4. Last First Kiss - I dunno. It sounds "I Wishy"-y, which means I'll probably never really like it as much as the others. The name is also stupid. But Liam does sound lovely.
5. Heart Attack - YO DIS MY JAM!!! Insta-like. The melody is similar to/reminds me of Pink's "Don't let me get me," which can't be a bad thing. I feel like there's an explosive chorus waiting to happen. And the opening just draws you in, you know. YUSSSSS.
6. Rock Me - Okay this is one of the leaked tracks, so I can do a better analysis of this. Lol at "Do you remember Summer 09." PROBABLY NOT BECAUSE YOU WERE STILL A FETUS. Jk, they were like 15 or something. Its got the "We will Rock you" drum beat in the back, which is a cute touch. Its nice though, I actually like it a lot (after about three spins. I liked it fine the first time). Its not at all what I expected, but still good. Its got Louis on the whiny bits (where he's pining for her under the moonlight or something) that actually suit his voice pretty well, even though he sounds like he's straining the tiniest little bit. But I love big choruses, and this one is definitely anthemic. I can just imagine this in an arena/stadium concert venue when the music drops out and its just the voices. Also,the background at the chorus sounds a bit like Weezer's "Say it Ain't So," down to the guitar wails on the off-beats. Harry sounds great on this. Also "Rock Me" is easily the PG version of the song, if you know what I mean. lol, these cheeky monkeys.
7. Change My Mind - Acoustic. Louis starts it (meh). I can't really get a read on this. It doesn't sound very exciting though.
8. I would - Oooh this is the Tom Fletcher penned one, isn't it? It sounds fun! And fast. Like I said, they do fast very well. Lol at Tom writing "I want" and then "I would." From the clip it sounds like this will be the 2012 version of "Teenage Dirtbag," which will probably be amazing and my life story told through song. So great. I'm on board! And whoever says the "a lot" is sexual chocolate (Zayn/Liam? I think it's Zayn right before it switches)
9. Over Again - Ugh another Ed Sheeran song. I hate that I can't seem to get behind this song because anyone that knows me that I bow at the feet of the ginger prince. But it seriously just sounds too Sheeran-y to be One Direction. It just sounds like they are covering one of his songs. And like singing in fake British accents. I know they're british, but none of them are actually singing in their own accents. They're just singing like Ed. Moments was great because it didn't have the typical way that Ed sings his words, so it made it their own. you know? Whatever, maybe its not awful. Maybe i'll like it.
10. Back for You - meh. generic. I dunno. Not a fan.
11. They Don't Know About Us - okay. okay. okay. Can we just call this one "REMEMBER THAT TIME ONE DIRECTION RECORDED A BACKSTREET BOYS SONG AND IT WAS THE MOST AMAZING THING THATS EVER HAPPENED ON THIS EARTH". But like seriously. Its amazing, unadulterated pop perfection. If it isn't obvious this is one of the leaks. It starts off with a pretty piano bit. I was convinced this was going to be some sweet soft ballad. But its a mid-tempo affair with a HUGE CHORUS WITH THE DRUMS AND THE CHORDS AND THE HARMONIES AND THE EVERYTHING. I cried. Obviously. and ZAYN. SLAYING. EVERYONE. Oh my gosh, its like More than This part. 2 but like 18 times better. Its literally at the BSB standard (which I wasn't expecting for this album) like it was ripped from their come back album or something. Its cheesy and sappy, but by great Odin's beard, it just has everything I want in a pop song. Whoever wrote this needs the noble prize. This song has single-handedly renewed my faith in them as a group, pop as a genre, love, and humanity in general. If someone disagrees I will kill everything.
12. Summer Love - ew this sounds too lovey. I want a JT-esque Summer Love, dammit. JUSTIN, DO YOU HEAR ME??
13. She's not afraid - I dont know what this is called, but I LOVE IT. Its Na na na level infectious. Ooh and there's nice harmonies. and Harry sounds like sexual chocolate Also I hope all the other titles are correct haha. Its kind of hard to tell with some of these considering the clips are only 25 seconds long
14. Loved you First - I dunno dude. Sounds like a rejected midtempo Dragonette track. Which I can totally get behind because Dragonette is flaw-free. verdict's still out.
15. Nobody Compares? I think - I dont know why, but I like this one! also NIALL STARTING A SONG WHAT WHAT. "Pretty when you cry"...never true "You're so London, your own style" LOVE THIS LINE. SING IT ZAYN
16. Still the One - JK THIS IS NA NA NA PART 2! I can't get enough. Aw and they let Louis sing a lot again!
17. ??????- What the hell is this words? no.
So basically I've feeling good things about this after being super anxious before. All is right with the world. Weirdly enough, parts sound like the first album, but like not really. I think its going to play the same way where some songs when played in their entirety are just formulaic copies of each other (i hear the similar guitar work already) but like, who cares as long as it sounds good. Again, not expecting any game changers (although I'm convinced that They Don't Know About Us is the sound of their future if they're still around in 5 years. Its both fresh and retro at the same time...please Lord, be the sound of their future.). But I'm officially on board the One Direction second era train!
As per usual, I complain day in and day out that Justin Timberlake needs to stop kidding himself about being a #siriusactor and get back in the recording studio. Of course, I say this despite the fact that I've only seen him "acting" in the Disney Channel Original Movie "Model Behavior," which I am convinced is his finest work. For those who haven't seen this Disney Classic, here's a clip!
Start at 1:43 for a snippet of the Oscar-winning performance
1. Off topic, but a huge shout-out to all the biddies who put up literally EVERY DCOM EVER MADE on youtube. You are my heroes. Thank you for reminding everyone how DCOMs were done before everyone was already some try-hard on the Disney Channel and wanted to be a quadruple threat singer-dancer-actor-druggie or whatever (I'm obviously not including my home-skillet-biscuit Raven in that category because she is amazing and both That's so Raven and the Cheetah Girls were flawless).
2. HOLY CRAP THIS IS RUFF. He is just...trying so hard, with his Shaft-influenced long jacket. You can even see Brillo-head look up for a second (probably at the director) for the signal to go in for the kiss. And I refuse to believe that he is any better in his other movie roles than he is here.
He really was at his best when he was singing. Though I will admit that I really wasn't feeling Justified when it came out, I soon learned the error of my ways. It was essentially like the last NSYNC album Celebrity (Which was very good) minus the three flop back-up singers and JC. And then Futuresex/Lovesounds dropped and it felt like your 4th birthday all over again (I believe birthdays one through four were probably the best because you had no idea what was going on but everyone was losing their minds over your existance and giving you cakes and presents...the good old days) ...only really really sexy. I'm re-listening to the album as I write this and dying all over again. Seriously, almost every song is perfect. Futuresex/Lovesounds. Summer Love. My Love. LOVESTONED.
I mean, come on!!! How great is this song??? Even his horribly ill-fitting, un-ironed, three sizes too big grey suit during the "I Think That She Knows" part can't ruin this for me. Part of me thinks he realized that this was Pop Perfection tinged with R&B greatness and could never top it...and every day, millions of girls and boys shed a single tear about it.
However, that hasn't stopped tons of people from trying to fill the void over the last six years. But you know what its like? Its like when that old lady in Spain tried to restore the century old fresco...This is what we got:
...just...what...I cannot even...in the words of Ryan Lochte: "NO JEAH 4 YOU!"
This month alone, England has come out swinging with their Justin Timberlake inspired musicians. Three of my favorite pop music blogs (Discopop Directory and PopJustice and theProphetblog) have already weighed in on them, so I figure I can have a go.
The first offenders are X-factor runners-up, JLS.
Jack the Lad Swing
They are known for Marvin by far being the hottest in the group and being married to Rochelle from the Saturdays (oh wait, no one but me knows that?), having some catchy songs, and then some down right awful ones. 30 seconds of research just told me that their song "The Club is Alive", also known as THE WORST SONG/SINGLE PROBABLY EVER got to number 1 on the UK charts...I am literally dumbstruck. There must be something (like a bacteria) in the water over there that caused deafness during that week the song came out.
That being said, this is their new song. Its called...ugh..."Hottest Girl in the World"
My first reaction was, " Is this real life? WHO TOLD THEM THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA?? Are they really trying to beat themselves for worst song of all time right now?" I mean, objectively, it has all the makings of a Justified-era JT song. Especially in the production and and instrumentation. I'm getting major "Like I Love You" vibes from this. Too bad I hated that song when it came out :/ That explains why this doesn't work for me.
No actually, the reason this is awful is the lyrics. GOOD GRACIOUS THE LYRICS.
"I can be your Toy-friend"
...what? really?
"If you should ever wonder why these dudes all fall in line, it's cause they see that sexiness has finally been defined"
This is how I feel hearing that:
"How does it feel to be the hottest girl in the world right now?"
NO. NO. NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO. NO.
AND YOU KNOW WHAT THE WORST PART IS?
...I'm starting to like it a little bit...I think I need an intervention. Someone needs to come shake it out of me. Like, I KNOW. I know its terrible, but when everything but the beat drops out I start to do this:
I love myself but I hate myself. Okay I have to move on, but please, I need constant reaffirmation in the awfulness of this otherwise you might hear it as my new ringtone very soon. I hate how catchyness can so easily trump goodness with repeated listening :(
Next we have their White Soul Singer Flavor of the Month, Tyler James with "Single Tear"
First of all, who is this guy??
I'd never heard of him so I had to do some research. First, his name is actually Kenneth Gordon. Tyler James seems like a bit of a stretch in terms of name change, so I don't like him already. And apparently he is a The Voice UK runner-up (maybe this is a runner-up syndrome?) recently or something. And in 2002 he was hailed as "Britain's answer to Justin Timberlake."
...okay. Number one, NO ONE EVEN ASKED YOU THAT QUESTION, SO I REJECT YOUR ANSWER. And number two, NO. NO NO NO NO NO NO.
I mean, I've watched the video. Like, I get it.You can sing in falsetto. And the song like, isn't bad. It is all the things that I generally like. Its pretty catchy, super soulfully-angsty, and very "Cry Me a River." But that is exactly the problem. It's beyond unoriginal and just takes everything about the song and video for Cry Me a River, but makes it mediocre. I don't really need to watch someone slobbering over some girl while taking a video...again. It was weird and different and cool the first time, not now. Yeah, that's my problem. I also would have appreciated a bridge before the last chorus but like whatever. He's just trying too hard.
Finally, we have the youngin' known as Conor Maynard.
It was really hard trying to find a picture where he didn't look like an infant. oh welp.
Okay, I felt weird putting him in this post with the other TimberFakes. When he broke out from Youtube to the actual music charts, I feel like he was marketed more as a "British Justin Bieber," which I guess is somewhat valid. But since J Biebs is trying to market himself as a baby Justin Timberlake now with his new look and somewhat different sound (less womanish), by the transitive property of life, Conor fits into my broad generalization!
But you know what? I...dont hate it...at all. His voice is miles better that what you would expect from looking at his face. He was a glorious break (and anyone who knows me knows how I feel about singers with breaks in their voices), and his music is SUPER catchy (Can't Say No, and Vegas Girl for those who don't know...although I'm not sure what the hell a 'Vegas Girl' is according to him, or if he's ever been to Las Vegas).
This is his new song, "Turn Around" ft. Ne-Yo
This is Conor Maynard serving up some Chris Brown "Beautiful People"/"Dont Wake Me Up" realness with Ne-Yo to help give it more credibility. But I kind of see this as one of those aging estimation things they do on milk cartons for missing people, you know? I dont know, but I get the feeling that if JT was still making sweet music, he would have adapted to today's booming dance-electro-pop trend that everyone and their mom is doing right now, and that it would sound pretty similar to this. But while I actually dig this song a lot, I can't get over him forever looking like a fetus. Conor can call me back when he's gained about 30 pounds of fat and 20 pounds of muscle.
So basically I'll keep crying into my Futuresex/Lovesounds cd until Justin comes back...or until Robin Thicke releases something knew. He can definitely stay. He really is the only one that comes close and ticks almost all of the boxes.
So after singlehandedly catapulting One Direction to US fame and stardom (you're welcome, America!), I watched in awe of myself as everyone around me and their mother effectively lost control of their bodily functions whenever the fearsome five-some took to a stage, sang their precious harmonies in tune, or asked everyone to retweet some nonsense like #harryshowusyourwilly or #getnialltotweetmeorikillmycat. Needless to say, 1D has added a new layer of crazy to the American tweendon/Beliebers/me and most of my friends not seen since my BSB/Spice Girls craze zenith circa 1998. Not wanting to lose any momentum, the boys let us know earlier this year that there would be a new album out THIS YEAR. so naturally I was like:
...Because it had been a whole 5 minutes that I hadn't heard anything about One Direction and I was FREAKING THE EFF OUT.
Then a couple of days ago they put out this lovely message:
There were several things to note:
1) Liam and Louis look like that boy you liked in the 4th grade. You know what I'm talking about. The cute one (I dont think boys got "hot" until 6th grade) who was like, REALLY good at PE that you would tell everyone you kind of hated to throw suspension off of yourself. They are even equipped with the same windswept/gelled bangs. Why did we like that? More importantly, WHY DOES IT MAKE MY BODY FEEL LIKE THIS. Hold me, Liam.
2) My love Zayn is looking a bit too frail for my liking. He's got the hourglass shape that I've been working towards (and failing) for the past three months, and I do not approve. I actually think Liam ate Zayn, his cheeks like a bit filled out. Buy yourself a happy meal, love. I know it costs like 85 pounds in England, but still...
3) Niall sure loves his tank tops.
4) Harry wuz thurr. And his hair-helmet seems slightly less voluminous.
But the most important thing to note is that the all important sophomore album first single is fast approaching. I will thus use as little logic as I can to really break this down for all three of you that are genuinely interested. So many things go into a successful single, what with so many critics and fans to please with a signature sound while showing some sort of growth...
Lawlz.
Lets be serious, One Direction could poop on a blank CD, call it their new album, and set the price at $100000, and they would still smash every record ever thanks to the thirst of women (and some men) in the 12-22 age range. But I'm here to evaluate the full package as it becomes available. So here goes nothing. The three part analysis is as follows...
ABENA'S AMAZING BUT COMPLETELY BS ANALYSIS OF THE NEW ONE DIRECTION SINGLE
1) Title and Lyrics
So Thanks to the video we were given the single name "Live While We're Young" First Thoughts: Ew. This is gonna be some poor attempt at a mature ballad-y man-band song in the style of every song ever that has the words "live like you're dying" or "I hope you dance" or "dance like you're tryna get some because your body wont look this good again" (thats a thing right?) Thoughts upon further analysis: Well to be fair, who knew that "What makes you beautiful" would be as good as it was without being as ballad-y as the Backstreet song of similar name? And plus, I love most of One Direction's man-ballads. They were surprisingly not shit in the slightest, and they do them really well. So I guess it wouldn't be that bad. And plus its probably not a ballad. I feel like "Its Gotta Be You" was the least successful of the 1D singles and it was a mid-tempo sleepy affair (I say this despite my love for Zayn on this track), especially compared to One Thing and WMYB. So at this rate, this will probably be WMYB Part 3. Also because it has the same writers Savan Kotecha, Rami Yacoub (SONGWRITING GOD), and Carl Falk. I am already so excited for this that I just peed a little woops.
We were also blessed with the album title "Take Me Home"
First Thoughts: "YES. SHALL WE TAKE YOUR CAR OR MINE?" Thoughts upon further analysis: lol this effing kids, I love them. The first album was "Up All Night", this one "Take Me Home". The next three albums will probably be "Lets Do It", "You're On the Pill, Right?" and "Songs for my Baby Mama". Ugh, this boys are reeking of reckless unprotected youthful abandon and I couldn't be happier about it. All I have to say is:
Now we wait for what will probably be earth shattering lyrics like "you're so pretty with your hair pushed back, let's kiss because this life dont last forever, so as long as we're here we might as well LIVE WHILE WE'RE YOUNG". I think yes.
2) The Video/The "leaked" Video shoot pictures
OH NOES!! Someone not at all affiliated with the One Direction PR machine leaked some pictures of the boys at their secrete video shoot for their new song. DAMN YOU SOCIAL MEDIA FOR SPREADING THOSE PICS LIKE SMOOTH PEANUT BUTTER OVER A HOT CROISSANT.
Oh look here's one now!
So again, several things
1) Niall is naked. Which is a complete reversal of the WMYB shoot where he was the only one YOLOing in the ocean with his shirt on. Yay for confidence, Niall! Your six pack (and 30 pounds of padding hopefully) will grow in soon!
2) Yup, there is a giant phallic banana and squirt guns. No maturity detected on this video set. YAY FOR WHAT MAKES YOU BEAUTIFUL PART 3!!
3) Why is it that all the boys are enjoying Louis' face while Harry is in the corner macking on some girl getting ready to overwhelm him? Because such is life I guess. She must be like at least 30 though for her to even be slightly believable as a possible love interest.
So we're waiting for the moving picture version of the video. I predict it will be magical and carefree and vanilla as anything.
So I guess the only thing that is missing is part 3, which is the song itself and the live performance of the song (I'll add that when they become available. So far, scowling the internets has produced absolutely no leaks. merde). Added together, these elements make or break an emerging artists' blossoming career. But again its 1D so it wont matter. As long as they stay cute and keep shelling out quality pop music, the sun will continue to set in the west, and hairflipping conquers all.
So here is me shamelessly plugging my mash-up cover of the stupidly amazing 1D song Na Na Na
Maybe it’s because it has been a solid year since I’ve flown
anywhere, and on top of that, over two years since I’ve done the grueling 7
hours to London, 4+ hour layover, 8 hours to Accra flights, but I now remember
that I HATE flying. I think what happened was that I got jaded by the those United Dulles to Accra 9 hour flights. I
continue to stand by my hatred for that airline and everything about it, but I think that it just ended with me romanticizing flying on British Airways. Well guess what? My love/love relationship is over. Sad times.
Here’s the reasons why this 2 day adventure was mis:
1.I initially had the idea of doing a blog
comparing my generation to my 12 year old sister’s. Here’s how the conversation
went…
Me: Amy, I’m going to do a blog about how
my generation is better than your generation, so you need to tell me music and
television that your people (tweens) like and I can compare it to my superior
stuff
Amy: What? Why?...Okay. How about the
Hunger Games?
Me: You can’t claim that. That’s mine.
Amy: Why? You haven’t even finished the
book (note: that’s false. I’ve barely started the book. That’s more accurate).
And it came out more recently
Me: no Amy, I’m thinking more like the
Hannah Montanas, and Justin Biebers and the Carly Rae Jepsens. And all those
horrid Disney channel shows.
Amy: I don’t like any of those things.
So eventually I learned that Amy is much cooler than I ever
was at 12, and that I wasn’t really giving teens and tweens a fair chance
(mostly because my teen and tween years WERE actually superior in terms of television
and musical content…sorry, I’m doing it again). So since I was leaving the country
soon, it only seemed right that I try and rot my brain as much as possible
while I still have a steady internet stream. Of course the best way to do this
is Marathoning. You know, when you watch a TV show back to back to back for as
long as possible, coming up for air only to go to the bathroom and sleep. Real
Marathoners go hard and take the computer with them to the bathroom in order to
stay in the rhythm and not lose momentum, but to each his own method. When it
comes down to it, I’m pretty much an Olympian at this. I’d heard some things
(good and bad) about the show Teen Wolf, and decided to go for the Marathon and
then compare it to a similar show that I watched at that age, “Big Wolf On
Campus” (props to anyone that remembers that).
I'm pretty sure I was in love. WOOF WOOF!
Well, long story short, I
haven’t gotten around to rewatching the pilot of BWOC because I AM HOOKED ON
THE TEEN WOLF (I will eventually though!). I dont know if its actually aimed at teens and tweens, but there is so much good going on in that show (plus the BEST soundtrack), but I really can't stop watching. This is also coming from girl who lives for shows like Footballers' Wives and the Bachelor/Bachelorette, so I dont really know if I'm actually a good judge of quality. But had we not left for the airport, I would have finished season
one all on Monday. So I was so angry when traveling cut this addiction short.
Doesn't this make it look like the worst show of all time? Shockingly it isn't.
2.Flying is usually fun because you can people
watch like nobody’s business. For me, it extends a bit further. Usually you can
pick out an attractive person and see the odds of you seeing them multiple
times between checking in and boarding. And every time you do see them, you
have to try to draw attention to yourself to see if they notice you. In a
perfect world they would notice you and happen to be getting on the same plane
and be seated within casual conversation distance, thus creating a sort of
7 hour whirlwind airport romance. It’s usually not very hard because hot people are always
traveling. However, on August 13th, 2012, all the pH 14 people IN THE WORLD must have decided to take the British Airways flight to London because it was
abysmal. There was actually for the first time ever, NO ONE of interest on my
flight. And if I even for a minute thought that someone was attractive, the
other shoe would drop. The other shoe was usually their 15 kids and/or tacky
and loud outfits. Denim on denim on denim is NOT a good look, kids.
3.None of my favorite Olympians got inexplicably trapped
at Heathrow long enough for me to get pictures with them/be their best friends/soulmates.
I’d been counting on that. (on a positive note though, I did see the Brazilian
Paralympic Team!). Pas bon fromage.
4.There was this super cute couple in front of me
at the British Airways check-in. They had two sets of twin girls, the most
adorable girls in the entire world (Which is saying a lot because I dont even like girls). Then I saw that they were on both of my
flights and my heart just sank. Crying. Babies. Every. Hour. Of. The. Flight. I
KID YOU NOT. I know I know I am horrible and they’re just kids and they popping
of the ears probably hurt then a lot. I DON’T CURR. I was over it the very
first minute.
5.Horrible neighbors. Everyone who knows me knows
that I am a people pleaser, almost to a fault. But I almost couldn't handle the people I had to sit next to. Mom, Al, and Amy were together so I had to bite the stranger danger bullet. First this old man and his old wife pretended not to understand/speak english as the pushed my seat repeatedly. Then old girl tried to steal my blanket. I actually grew a pair (I was surprised too) and didn't give in. THEN old man spilled his drink on me
(which too be fair was probably an accident), and then laughed at me….no, he
CACKLED. I was so livid I ALMOST gave them a death stare...almost. And then on the second flight, the man next to me dressed in all white like he was going to a Diddy party asks me for my pen. I mean, it doesn't sound that bad, but it really annoyed me. It wasn't like I wasn't using the pen, I was. I was clearly and very vocally involved in solving the crossword puzzle. He sees this and still asks me, even though his thing could have waited until any other time on the flight. ugh, whatever.
6.Gritty British dramas – I love them but I hate them.
I feel like Brits just aren’t into happiness all that much. Other than 'Love, Actually,' 'Bridget Jones,' and maybe a couple of other films, all the british drama that I get
exposed to leaves me depressed and sad because inevitably your favorite
character dies horrifically in one way or another. I missed the start of
Avengers on my TV thing, so I started watching this film called 'Wild Bill.'
It’s
actually rather cute when you read the description. Basically, a deadbeat dad gets out of
prison after serving eight years for drugs and battery and comes back to try and take care of his two
sons who have their own normal adolescent problems, LIKE DEALING CRACK, GETTING
WITH TEEN MOMS AND WORKING CONSTRUCTION TO AFFORD TOAST FOR DINNER EVERY NIGHT.
So the movie is going along and there’s lots of shouting and swearing and
instructional footing on how to make crack. But I can never enjoy it fully because I'm anxiously waiting for the 11 year old to get shanked or shot in the head because that's just how British dramas end. It actually wasn't that extreme as it turns out, and it was a really good enjoyable movie (shockingly). The dad really grows on you
and it also stars Ewan Rhoen of Misfits fame as the teen mom’s babby daddy
(maybe not his best work) and that annoying tit Eustis from the third Narnia
movie. Except he suffers from Freddy Highmore/that kid from love actually syndrome
where they’re like 6 feet tall now, but still have the faces of ten year olds.
Its pretty disconcerting when he’s trying get his mack on with teen mom.
His birth certificate says he's 19 (what) but his face screams WAAAAH I MADE A POOP IN MY DIAPER
But basically all I want is super Vanilla Disney disney endings. IS THAT SO BAD?
7. Finally, Baggage claim. We got in at 8:30...and we left baggage claim at 10:30. TWO HOURS??? This was Southwest Airlines baggage claim/Joe Jackson level bad. Bags were everywhere scattered everywhere, people were hostile, and it was just the most epic fail of airport happenings known to man. I guess 6 planes landed at the same time, and everyone lost their minds.
But I'm here! And leave for Takoradi tomorrow! Off to take full advantage of this jetlag
So recently, Snoop Dogg decided to change his name to Snoop Lion. I started on my typical judgement:
...Because that is actually the stupidest name change known to man. What really annoys me is that he thought he could go from a dog to a cat. He's really tryna animorph into another family, species, and genus like its no big deal. C'mon son. And plus I have strong feelings about cats.
But then I thought back to another famous business name change that actually worked out well: Sean "Puff Daddy" Combs to Sean "P. Diddy" Combs...to Sean "Diddy" Combs. Who could have predicted that would turn out so well? Seriously....this guy:
just fastforward to 1:50 to watch him eat cereal with orange juice and then "dance". smh.
As I sat and watched this video, I scratched my head. Then laughed. Then remembered that this was Diddy and got angry. Why? Because he is the single worst manager of all time. He's taken groups and individuals that I've liked under his wing and basically killed any chance of them having any longevity in the music business. To be fair, I have no evidence that he actually purposefully placed the poison apple of failure in their midst, but he is the common factor. Where there's smoke, there's fire; where there's fire, there's cambodian breast milk; and where there's cambodian breast milk, there's Diddy, ruining everyone's music careers. Lets look at a couple of people/bands that just dont exist anymore:
a) Dream
Dream was everyone's favorite girl band for like 6 days in 2001. They consisted of the lead (and only) singer ginger girl, the Hispanic girl, the short haired blonde girl who got some talky bits, and the annoying long haired blonde girl who got the other talky bits (I dont know why but she was always my least favorite). They joined Diddy's Bad Boy records (misstep number one) dropped this song and it became a hit, giving every fifth grade girl the musical accompaniment and inspiration to confront the hoochie who was talking to (as in literally speaking to) her fifth grade man. Just when the world thought they had been blessed with the White Destiny's Child (they still had four members back then didn't they?), Diddy comes in and ruins everything. They release the fantastic follow-up single "This is me," and you're starting to count your chickens before they hatch. Never fear, in swoops Diddy to release THE SAME SONG as their third single, but as a "remixed" (i.e. crap) version. I'm groaning and shaking my head as I type this.
I mean, he basically gets way to close to long haired blonde for most of the video, adds an unknown rapping guy who looks like a fat version of Hoodie Allen minus all his likeability and flow, and then hijacks the video to dance by himself for like 30 seconds. I'm also convinced that that isn't even him dancing. WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS DIDDY. Long story short, Dream became a nightmare and fell of the face of the earth forever, the end.
B) Cassie
Hey, did you know that Cassie has had a song out for the last 6 months and that her second album is "dropping" in September? NOPE.
So young Cassie was just some pretty biddy underage drinking and dancing at some clubs when Ryan Leslie picked her out of the moshing crowd and wanted to make her a star. Cool. He writes "Me and U" for her (you know, that song where she's dancing ALONE for the whole song), it becomes a hit at clubs in Europe. Huzzah! Then Diddy gets involved. Ruh-roh. I'm starting to get a bit antsy because of the whole Dream fiasco, but I give it a shot. And surprisingly, I get one of my favorite songs of 2006, Long Way 2 Go:
I'm just like YUSSSS DIS MA SONG!! In retrospect, the lyrics are pretty atrocious and her rapping is...I mean, she's just talking. But I was super into it, so whatever. But then, nothing. I'm waiting patiently, but nada. Zip. Zilch.
...Basically we never hear about her again. Oh except that when she was the featured girl in Kanye's Stronger video and STILL not putting out mediocre music that I can grind to at parties. I'm not mad. And she was DATING DIDDY. I just...WHY. That's probably the reason she was never dropped from Bad Boy Records, but it's like a double edged sword, innit? She's legally/emotionally bound to him, so she's never out of a job, but she'll probably never release anything of substance again and stay stuck looking like Skrillex because of her stupid haircut. She can't escape. Sadness.
And the new song isn't even that good. SAVE US RYAN LESLIE, PLEASE. WE WERE SO CLOSE.
C) All "Making the Band" Groups Ever
This is probably why Diddy is the worst. He makes us sit through like 85 seasons of "Making the Band," has each band release one song, and then dissolves them. The two most prominent ones were Danity Kane and Day26. "Da band" doesn't count because they never had a chance, even with the top 5 rappers of all time in the group.
Danity Kane, however, was supposed to be a good group. My girl Aundrea was the Christina Aguilera of the group (you know, before Christina got horrible and started ruining the national anthem). Aubrey was actually talented and pretty. Dawn was there (I dont remember anything else about her). The other two I dont even remember, but they worked. This song was great...kind of
I mean, I dont know. Its another one of those situations where now that I'm listening to this they should definitely have been broken up based on merit because this song is what it would sound like if your voice box was a kazoo. I can't believe this was a real song. Everything about this is terrible. But fifteen year old me was all about showstopping in my kitten heels at homecoming.
BUT OF COURSE, Diddy wasn't feeling my showstopping, and pulled this act.
For the first time, you actually get to WATCH him dissolve someone's career. My favorite part is when Diddy is all "Emotions will have you broke," when he has more Emotions than a dorm full of hormonal first year girls on their periods. Then he up and fires Aubrey and poof, what do we have now?
Woof. Aubrey now spends her days ruining Arsenio Hall's life on the Celebrity Apprentice. And Diddy Dirty Money, his new group with Dawn? Haven't heard from them in forever (Hello, Goodmorning was a surprise hit though.). So he actually killed two birds with one stone.
And then there's Day26. Day26 has a special place in my heart, despite the fact that I wouldn't recognize anyone in this group if they came up to me in the middle of the street and said 'Hi! I'm in Day26' and started singing "Got Me Going". I'm all about them though because I will always support men with semi-soulful voices who can harmonize. And this song was a JAM:
But other than this, I cannot for the life of me name a single other song by these guys. Again, I'm pretty sure this was around the same time that Diddy swooped in with Diddy Dirty Money and made all his groups a side project to his own side project. Ugh, I feel like even I could do a better job than this.
Basically Diddy shouldn't be allowed to handle people, only money. and even then you kind of have to be skeptical:
...he's just...so confused.
So Lets recap: 5 for Diddy (counting DDM), and none for the mediocre music loving american public, bye.
