Its about that time again...

That's right. Its November, so I'm due to have a freakout about and preview the 25-30 second One Direction Album clips, making gross over- and underestimations about the future of the band and pop music in general. AAAAAH I'm giddy just thinking about it.

ZUT. muffins

As their self-proclaimed one-woman North American promotion team (I kid, I kid), I take pride in my 1D pimping. Its only because I try this all the time with all the British/African/Australian/Euro-in-general music that I listen to, and One Direction was one of the first times that other people were actually also listening to something that I was listening to without me having to force them into it. Watching every pregame and party turn into a One Direction love-in by the end of the night over the course of last year was like watching a water birth, but in the way where at first you're like "wtf" (because you can't believe its happening) but then decide you're gonna enjoy the moment and start cheering for the baby like you're at game 7 of the NBA finals. 

this was supposed to be a picture of a water birth but I almost threw up searching for pictures, so instead we're gonna look at Captain America himself, Carlos Bocanegra (or Charles Blackmouth as he's known in Mexico)

The greatness of Up All Night as a comprehensive pop album still hasn't worn off on me (Its still one of the only two CDs I have in my car, the other being Babel by Mumford and Sons). But as the music industry is now about staying relevant, less than a year later (or maybe exactly a year, I dont know) they are already preparing to drop the second album, Take Me Home. They're clearly following the Rihanna method of 'record an album for every breath you take,' which is fine I guess. But it doesn't really allow for the growth and evolution in their sound that people seem to expect from musicians these days (of course, this might just be me and all the people on all the pop blogs and forums that I read religiously. And before you ask, I do currently have two jobs. What is my life). Which is honestly fine and dandy, because they seem pretty aware of this fact. Live While We're Young was the perfect example of that. I obviously love it, but it was by no means a "game-changer." If anything, they were just slightly more explicit about the sexual nature of their lyrics, but that's about it. It appeals to the masses, is catchy as hell (though perhaps not as catchy as WMYB), and suffered from an untimely leak (no thanks to you, Australian tv station) that saw it going up against Rihanna's Diamonds and Gagnam Style in the charts. But otherwise, they seemed to me to be following the course towards another successful campaign.

Then this little ditty dropped.

Little Things is an ginger prince Ed Sheeran penned stripped back ballad (obviously so). And its fine. It is. I probably cried when I heard it first (in fact, I'm almost positive I did), but thats because I always cry about everything. But its definitely a grower. Zayn and Liam sound like heaven in the first verse (comme d'hab), and the first chorus is perfect because it is Zayn heavy and I would listen to him sing my college/med school rejection letters. Then it gets a bit weird. Louis comes in with the second verse. Louis is not the strongest singer (I'm not that blinded by their light that I would lie about that) but I also started to realize that he also has one of the more distinct tones. Its like, almost a little too bright or some other term that I dont know how to misuse, and a little nasal. And this fact coupled with his small vocal range makes him stick out like a sore thumb on his solo lines when he actually has them. And as a side note, he doesn't blend well in general (they usually mask this in other songs by having him on melody with Harry and Zayn). But its honestly a passable effort, and Niall sounds fine on his bit. Harry sounds like a chain smoker on his verse, but is good on the chorus. And the last chorus is really pretty and great. Overall, its actually not bad and gets better with every listen. But good lord, the lyrics. They're the reason why I haven't been able to get into this as much as I wanted to. And I love Ed Sheeran. Like way a lot. But he wrote this when he was 15 (true fact) and found the scribbles in his trashcan and said 'I'll give this poop to my mates in One Direction, innit bruv?' (probably an exaggeration). They're just...awful. Like, I'm all about the pandering to young insecure girls, but this just doesn't feel the same. It kind of takes the charm of What Makes You Beautiful, but turns it on its head a bit. Whereas before I was flipping my hurr and smiling at the ground and shit like that, this time my flaws have been enumerated and named...and its almost like they'll love you in spite of that instead of because of it. Does that makes sense? Its like trading in Zooey Deschanel or Bridget Jones, a quirky hot girl who pretends not to realize she's hot, a la What Makes You Beautiful, for Helga Pataki, or basically a girl with a unibrow and low self esteem (clearly masked by her tough exterior). This song would be like every time Arnold  says something sweet to her and she suddenly gets lovey-dovey and validated and I hate that.

STAY STRONG HELGA GIRL YOU DONT NEED A MAN TO MAKE YOU FEEL BEAUTIFUL.

Its so silly, because the message of both songs are very similar, but its the delivery that kills it a bit. Also, the word "thighs" just needs to stay the hell away from music forever. Ed clearly just kept all the good songs for himself haha.

                                      
But the video is quite redeeming isn't it? Its an understated black and white affair which allows you to focus on how attractive everyone has become instead of the lyrics. Zayn and Harry remains flawless. Louis has slowly but steadily been shuffling the hotness line-up, and his denim jacket is a good look. Niall still stares into the camera for an awkwardly long amount of time, but like give it six months, and he'll be smouldering with the best of them (probs when his braces come off). and Liam...well, Liam at least looks like he's recovering from his post-breakup Britney-esque breakdown buzzcut (you can't tell me thats not what it was. hide the umbrellas y'all).

its okay 5-head. No one is judging you for your emotional reaction to the break up.

So basically the visual helped ease my disappointment in the second single, which is exactly what happened with Gotta Be You. In fact, Gotta Be You and Little Things basically served the same purpose. The ballad-y/mid-tempo second single that is a solid album track but REALLY REALLY should never have been a single. But again, growers.

So anyway. The actual point of this whole thing. I went into this thing with mixed expectations after hearing the first two singles. But here's my ramble-y album preview review!

2. Kiss You - ooooh I like this one!!! Its instantly infectious and makes you wanna run or something equally as silly. It reminds me of a song that you would hear in the Disney Channel Original Movie 'Get a Clue,' or something of that ilk. They do fast well. Zayn and Harry sound marvelous in this clip. Oh and the album title comes from this one! the verses are frantic and then it slows down into an awesome chorus. Here for this!

3. C'mon C'mon - eh. Its okay. I hear potential. It has a "My Life would Suck without you" kind of beat. Or I guess its a similar driving beat thats in "Save you Tonight" from the first album. So I'll probably like it eventually. On second listen its very much in the vein of Save you Tonight. Generic sounding but ultimately fun

4. Last First Kiss - I dunno. It sounds "I Wishy"-y, which means I'll probably never really like it as much as the others. The name is also stupid. But Liam does sound lovely.

5. Heart Attack - YO DIS MY JAM!!! Insta-like. The melody is similar to/reminds me of Pink's "Don't let me get me," which can't be a bad thing.  I feel like there's an explosive chorus waiting to happen. And the opening just draws you in, you know. YUSSSSS.

6. Rock Me - Okay this is one of the leaked tracks, so I can do a better analysis of this. Lol at "Do you remember Summer 09." PROBABLY NOT BECAUSE YOU WERE STILL A FETUS. Jk, they were like 15 or something. Its got the "We will Rock you" drum beat in the back, which is a cute touch. Its nice though, I actually like it a lot (after about three spins. I liked it fine the first time). Its not at all what I expected, but still good. Its got Louis on the whiny bits (where he's pining for her under the moonlight or something) that actually suit his voice pretty well, even though he sounds like he's straining the tiniest little bit. But I love big choruses, and this one is definitely anthemic. I can just imagine this in an arena/stadium concert venue when the music drops out and its just the voices. Also,the background at the chorus sounds a bit like Weezer's "Say it Ain't So," down to the guitar wails on the off-beats. Harry sounds great on this. Also "Rock Me" is easily the PG version of the song, if you know what I mean. lol, these cheeky monkeys.

7. Change My Mind - Acoustic. Louis starts it (meh). I can't really get a read on this. It doesn't sound very exciting though.

8. I would - Oooh this is the Tom Fletcher penned one, isn't it? It sounds fun! And fast. Like I said, they do fast very well. Lol at Tom writing "I want" and then "I would." From the clip it sounds like this will be the 2012 version of "Teenage Dirtbag," which will probably be amazing and my life story told through song. So great. I'm on board! And whoever says the "a lot" is sexual chocolate (Zayn/Liam? I think it's Zayn right before it switches)

9. Over Again - Ugh another Ed Sheeran song. I hate that I can't seem to get behind this song because anyone that knows me that I bow at the feet of the ginger prince. But it seriously just sounds too Sheeran-y to be One Direction. It just sounds like they are covering one of his songs. And like singing in fake British accents. I know they're british, but none of them are actually singing in their own accents. They're just singing like Ed. Moments was great because it didn't have the typical way that Ed sings his words, so it made it their own. you know? Whatever, maybe its not awful. Maybe i'll like it.

10. Back for You - meh. generic. I dunno. Not a fan.

11. They Don't Know About Us - okay. okay. okay. Can we just call this one "REMEMBER THAT TIME ONE DIRECTION RECORDED A BACKSTREET BOYS SONG AND IT WAS THE MOST AMAZING THING THATS EVER HAPPENED ON THIS EARTH". But like seriously. Its amazing, unadulterated pop perfection. If it isn't obvious this is one of the leaks. It starts off with a pretty piano bit. I was convinced this was going to be some sweet soft ballad. But its a mid-tempo affair with a HUGE CHORUS WITH  THE DRUMS AND THE CHORDS AND THE HARMONIES AND THE EVERYTHING. I cried. Obviously. and ZAYN. SLAYING. EVERYONE. Oh my gosh, its like More than This part. 2 but like 18 times better. Its literally at the BSB standard (which I wasn't expecting for this album) like it was ripped from their come back album or something. Its cheesy and sappy, but by great Odin's beard, it just has everything I want in a pop song. Whoever wrote this needs the noble prize. This song has single-handedly renewed my faith in them as a group, pop as a genre, love, and humanity in general. If someone disagrees I will kill everything.

12. Summer Love - ew this sounds too lovey. I want a JT-esque Summer Love, dammit. JUSTIN, DO YOU HEAR ME??

13. She's not afraid - I dont know what this is called, but I LOVE IT. Its Na na na level infectious. Ooh and there's nice harmonies. and Harry sounds like sexual chocolate Also I hope all the other titles are correct haha. Its kind of hard to tell with some of these considering the clips are only 25 seconds long

14. Loved you First - I dunno dude. Sounds like a rejected midtempo Dragonette track. Which  I can totally get behind because Dragonette is flaw-free. verdict's still out.

15. Nobody Compares? I think - I dont know why, but I like this one! also NIALL STARTING A SONG WHAT WHAT. "Pretty when you cry"...never true "You're so London, your own style" LOVE THIS LINE. SING IT ZAYN

16. Still the One - JK THIS IS NA NA NA PART 2! I can't get enough. Aw and they let Louis sing a lot again!

17. ??????- What the hell is this words? no.

So basically I've feeling good things about this after being super anxious before. All is right with the world. Weirdly enough, parts sound like the first album, but like not really. I think its going to play the same way where some songs when played in their entirety are just formulaic copies of each other (i hear the similar guitar work already) but like, who cares as long as it sounds good. Again, not expecting any game changers (although I'm convinced that They Don't Know About Us is the sound of their future if they're still around in 5 years. Its both fresh and retro at the same time...please Lord, be the sound of their future.). But I'm officially on board the One Direction second era train!


....lets be real, I never got off.